Sharing is something....

I did something gud today..nothing big but still..
it is something that makes me feel really gud..
so wat was it?
sharing...sharing the lesser with the person who need it most...almost badly as me...
without wanting anything in return..
I shud also thanks to the dearest person that remember to share with me...thank you dear..although u may neva know i dedicate this entry for you..
now, with that small portion..everyone was hoping in their prayers that this time around the prayers is granted...
Insya-allah......

When I feel like writing..

I feel like writing...
for my heart is no longer here..
my soul is empty to be filled with anything about here....
my ears ..its just dun want to hear anything relating to this place...
wats wrong with me?
i used to like it here..
i used to love e'one here...
i used to tire up myself for its sake..yet i'm doing it with happiness..
with every completion with a smile of satisfaction..
is it me?
or is it this place..
i dunno..
yet i care..coz it used to care for me
am i ok?
i think i am?
then wat went wrong?
I decided to move on..
as much as i call it moving on..
but deep inside a small voice whisper intensively..
you are trying to escape dun you..
face it Nen..and end it with pride.....

Overreacted?

To my limits i've tried...if failure is meant to be..then let it be.......
one thing about me is that when under a lot of pressure... i usually would not be able to control my stress and my anger...
it can sometimes hurt the feeling of those ppl that i care...stressful emotional and mentally.....(alter ego: so u think only u can be stressed, only you have the biggest problem on earth, is not like u'r saving the world..nen you are not heroes...even heroes face certain failure)
listening to my alter ego.. i do perfectly understand that comparing my level of stress can be very minimal or none at all to certain individual..but when if u put up my problem on only 1 individual.. i just cannot handle it.....it is really sad of me to admit it..but this is just me..and lame excuse..
current i'm being stress with
my supplier...for he cannot deliver the things he is supposed to.
my customer is chassing me for this, and i dun like to be pictured as if i had not dun enaf...
i mean, i can undertsand her pressure too..but situations is all beyond my control.
too many internal policy and procedures to bring the things in..
but if i can, ..i would..swear to God ...i want to able to honour my words....
I raise up my voice to my client, which i know i 'm not supposed to...i regret for what i did..
with so many mix up emotion I kinda of burst out to her...for not wanting to accept any excuses.....
say who customer is always rite? well is only applicable to me when i am the customer.....
to my mum i let go my dissapointment, in subtle way i put the blame on her as well..
though i knew she did her best..even spoke to my client explaining how things is...glad she able to calm her down.
things turn out ok..that's wat i can say..its not gud..but it's ok..
work pressure : dun even feel wanna discuss it here........
test pressure : i'm supposed to attend for another option of my career life, a test will be conducted to verify whether i'm the person they are looking for...in few days time i got to study a few financial concept, which i've never pay any attention before..plus i've left my test addicted attitude/ freaking scared when it comes to test or exams long back in my dorm campus.......how am i supposed to find it back.......e'time i look at those material..dun feel like reading at all.........what is wrong with me?? loosing my mind to stupidity and idleness.
I need a space.....space from e'thing and e'one........space and space and space.......fuh i need to seek HIS guidance on this..........